Thursday, August 25, 2016

Quarter of a Century

I spent the first minutes of my birthday slumped and sleepy in a bus ride home after working overtime, hugging the company-issue jacket tighter around me to protect myself from the blast of the bus' AC. It was 12:07AM when I checked. Outside, the ever-busy EDSA was a racing blur; on the radio, REO Speedwagon was belting out "Can't Fight this Feeling" (I remember the driver singing along).

Inside my head, I was grasping at the newest reality of my life: I'm finally 25.

There shouldn't have been a Eureka moment for it; I already know I'm an adult, and I've long accepted the challenge. Still, the realizations hit me like a hammer to the head: TWENTY-FIVE, AIRIZ! There would be more of this. More OTs in the future. More bills to pay. More problems to wrestle with. More pain and heartaches. More snags, more glitches, more bumps in the road. More inner demons that gnaw at my heart at night, officially waving their fancy "Quarterlife Crisis" nickname as their All-Access Pass to the most fragile of my dreams.

But that'd mean there would be more of the good stuff, too. More memories to make. More artworks to churn out. More poetry to craft. More places to travel to and fall in love with. More strangers to turn into family. More laughter with friends. More distances to run. More TV shows and plays and flicks and musicals to rave about. More books to devour. More songs to listen and unleash our karaoke spirit to. More star-strewn skies to marvel at. More stories to write, more stories to share, more stories to live. More people to love and love and love. Thousands more of minutes to spend breathing. Millions more of seconds to spend living.

So I spent the rest of my birthday with people who matter the most to me--family--and thought, this isn't so bad. I'm terrified, true, but this can't be too bad. While this marked me another year older, this also gave me another chance to build a better version of myself. So let all the goods and the bads of this life come, and let 'em shape me into what I really want to be in this life. I may be a freaked-out, lost millennial, but along the way I know I'll find the right path to my destination. 😊 #birthday

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